HURT - I hate YOU

I m sad ar..............................
really like foolsih ar.......................................
totally like stupid...................................................
(crying)
i hate him so much now
he still keep cheat me and play me again and again
at the end, i m the one get hurt too deep...
sigh~
cry also useless..
how i did for him
he never unds my heart and never appreciate me
really torturing myself
i really want to give up this time
if still continue like that
i will going to crazy soon..
i really hate him now..
my heart really broken and pain..
breathless
i really stupid and idoit..
wanna slap myself
i hate him
i really hate him!!!!
i dont want to love him anymore..
forget him!

its my love

finally, i get what i want..
i m happy and touch now..
i m satisfied now
its enough for me..
that is my love..
XIN FU LE

i really happy right now..
i dont know how to say now
i dont know how to do now
just feel silly and happy now..
hahaha

i love you
muakss

too tired already

today i m very tired............
i cannot pay attention in training class tonight
but i m read comic during training
haha...

well, i m keep busy for my work really busy
time really not enough for me..
i need work over 5pm already now >.<
but always get scold by daddy
always work too late and let he waiting for me long time >.<
really tired le

No time for relax now...
but every section, mins, hours i also will think of him
once i m free, my mind and heart start to think of him and miss him
where is him now?
really gone? or he also give up me?
or he mad at me and hate me 4va?
or what?
i dont know
i just know he misunds me already from that time..
but i also never want to explain to him
just let it go..
now it maybe go.. but my heart really canot let him go..
miss him now and think of him now
what he doing?
i really wan to know where is him?
anyone can tell me
where is him?
i need him..
i want find him..
i really do love him so much

why my blog start to mention him again and again?
i realize that i really fall in love with him seriously..
i love him more than myself..
its my love..

i still miss him II

after woke up, i going to living room watch tv and read newspaper..
then i feel boring while watch tv, i go to ask my sister
intro some books for me
she intro comic for me..
haha
well, i m reading comic..
erm.. i love its love story
i wish i m that girl in the story
so sweet and "xin fu"
its actor also handsome...
that time i just only imagine him..
only he look like comic actor.. as my type..
only i thinking of him
only imagine him together with me
he always in my mind...
his soul also stay in my mind..
i still love him...
how?
haha
GG already..

i still miss him

i still miss him so much..
i know i m hurt him but he maybe misunderstood me already
nevermind, its my fate
i always think that whether i hurt him more than he hurt me? or what?
last time, i cried for him so many times coz he hurt me too much
now its become worthless..
i dont know this time whether he is gone or not.. its news from someone told me
if he was gone, then i just feel so sorry guilty and......... dont know how to say..
maybe he still here, just cheat me or what.. who knows?
last time, not i dont want to talk with him
always talk with him not really happy.. coz keep argue-ing..damn it!!!
hate it..

i miss that time he went to somewhere and always talk by skype with me everynight..
hv fun, keep laughing and sweet same like a couple and dating
its short memory for me
i still keep cards which he sent to me in my drawer, i always read it when i miss him
after he back to his home, all things become worst..

25/12/08, 19/1/09 and 19/2/09
these are... important dates
and he told me that he will find me as his promises
haha he make me dissappoint 2 times already
i think its no more hope to me..

hey baby when we are together, doing things that we love
everytime you are near i feel i m in heaven feeling high
i dont want to let go
i just need you to know
i dont want you run away, you are the one i need in my life..

when you are gone, the piece of my hear are missing you
when you walk away, i count the steps that you take
do you see how much i need you right now?
i never felt this way before everthing tha i do reminds me of you.

i really love you.. i really do
you are the one most i love in this life..
love you with my true heart.

do you feel it?

my mouth......>.<

today.. erm not bad
finally complete my decoration yeah~
thx to team member..
i know i was busy for my job today and less do decoration..
thx for cooperate with me
^^

today just see doctor because my mouth swelling and itchy lo
1 week already... still like tht
i cannot tahan it

i wish can recover asap
coz i feel i m ugly now coz my mouth haha like little suasage haha

tomolo also is a busy day >.<
haih tired..

i would be stronger..

today i feel quite tired
because i just back from training just now..
learning new product GMD^^
i sure pay attention to it but i still daydream sometime haha
actually i m feel sleepy already
its quite boring session..

sigh~ after this month, nobody can fetch me go home already..
i think i should discuss with my mum for it..
i need to attend it, its my job and learn things..
i dont dare to skip cause i scare that boss will asking something that i couldn't answer her, then will nag or scold by her..

erm.. today quite confused about my jobs and plans..
suddenly many things to handle..
like decoration, ha.. i really dont know i should incharge for office decoration..
totally dont know it , i though i just incharge for dinner decoration only..
nvm, its small matter, i shouldn't unhappy easily, but i assume i dint pay attention for listen what other people told me be4=)
so from now, this is new jobs for me again
well, at that time i feel confused and blur about my plan for decoration
i cant arrange a good time for my teams for this decoration.
but i want to thank him Mr J coz he give me his opinion.
so i decide to use his idea to settle it for tomolo
must complete it tomolo within one day..no matter hw
i wish i can do it..
haih why har?
some people have do it last time, why dont tell me how to do or give me suggestion le?
nvm, its my mistake.. learn from it.. positive thinking now haha
in fact, i feel upset lo.. =(

always talk about my job
i also feel boring..
but i dont have time to think other things haha
no mood to think
mind full of job job job job...

dont talk about it anymore..hng

really "fan"

chinese new year coming soon, i still cant feel excite right now..
i heard boss said chu3 can start working le..
arh.. so fast?
should i take leave? go to relax?
or go to work hard?
i also dont ...
i wish can at least 1 week holiday la..
relax more during chinese new year
afterward, need work harder........especially OA training..and SALES

job again.. =.=
stop it.. STOP!!

erm... i already bought many clothes haha for chinese new year
spend alots.. wow..
now need control my spending and plan to saving and buy protection for myself lo..=)

i need to thank Mr K, he really loves me so much, sayang me so much
when i get trouble, he will concern me, suggest me, support me, teach me how to handle it..
i always share with him my problems and always cry in front of him..
although, he scold me, said me or shoot me, i will feel mad but also good for me, at least he can make me alert and better.
i love him so much even i always bully him haha

his birthday coming soon, wish to have a sweet celebrate with him =P
now plan to give him supprise
what it is?
haha =.=
dont know yet
dont have time to think about it..
haha

well, i will stop here and going to sleep now
wish myself tomolo will settle it smoothly and well =)
goodluck..

good day but tired

today, i m trying to wake up at 7am but.. i fall sleep again after awake..
haha coz i still feel sleepy and tired..
erm.. maybe not enough rest yesterday
haha...
after bath and breakfast, i m waiting for daddy fetch me go to office
oh no.. maybe my daddy cannot wake up today without my mum
my mum go to travel already. So my daddy sleep alone with his pillow.. haha
but lucky when i reach office, many agents still haven't come yet and i have few mins for prepare my things for meeting.

well..
today morning session is talk about 2009 goal.
trainer share alots knowledges and new things with us.
what i learning today?

i need setting my new goal for this year
not only for my job and also for my personal life
i will try to work with my BRAIN, not my HAND, not only work HARDER, must work SMARTER
i want to learn how to manage and control production and team
i want to earn more money
actually i dont interested with my job right now..
but its my job, i need working for my job even i dislike this job..
no matter how its difficult, i also need to be patient and work hard!
this is my promise to myself...do it with my effort..
i hope i can do it..and challenge it
i know its very pressure to me.. i m always cry for it..
but i also will continue it
untill the suitable time to leave it.. haha
maybe mr J is right, we only will be improved if we get pressure..

how about my goal for personal life?
i hunger to get a car
its convenient to me as well
i can go anywhere by driving myself
and i can do anythings that i like haha

i want to marry >.<
i need a man to feed me haha
give me money for spend..spend...spend..
wahaha

always hunger to marry sooner cause working life really pressure and suffer than studying life
i miss it so much..
can be queen housewife hahahaha=.=

i want to start save money as well
coz i want to buy car, do gym and so on

i want to keep fit!!!
coz i feel i m getting fatter... >.<
i need slim down like jolin tsai haha
wow..

i need to care my health
i must seldom drink cold water!!!
i m challenging with it
but i still love drink cold water >.<>
cannot! i need change it!

financail and family?
i haven't plan it
haha
always have financial problems
sigh~

today, i meet Mr J
he remind me to read books
haha
actually i dont like to read books.
nvm, i go to find 3 books 1st and
when i m free, i will go to read them.

as i know, want to be a successful person, need to read more books and more knowledges
so? when i wanna to do it for myself?
haiyo..

so tired le after working, issit my body get weak already?
maybe less execise..
headache now.. cannot look at computer screen too much
eye pain too..

oh ya, today boss said she have something want tell me and ask me..
wah i feel so scare now
i scare she scolding me >.<
i will cry one..
but i always tell myself must be strong! dont scare her!
erm.... still same =.=
wish tomolo will be a good day for me
god bless me!!!

my new life

wow! i use few hours to make up this blog

haha quite boring and tired =)

erm..

in the year 2009, i would write my blog everyday as my dairy.

oh why?

no reason..

just like to save some memories for myself

i would share anythings here and read myself haha

but i haven't read my document coz i need present it to my boss..

haha.. going to die sooner..

okie, i go to offline and read the document before i going to bed..

what? now is 12.10am already.. haha

too bad..

before sleep, i wish i wont get scold by boss tomolo, god bless me please!